3 posts tagged “new year's”

maybe one of my resolutions should include getting things done in a timely manner.  you know, like editing photos, or blogging, or putting away my washed-last-week laundry.  maybe.

so, last year i answered this in a QotD, It's Going To Be Different This Year.  for those of you not wanting to follow the jump, here were my resolutions.

• to be more confident.
• to take an active role in my life.
• to continue having new adventures.
• to make the most of this new life i've created here in washington, dc.

i'd say i think i did pretty well on these in 2007!  making resolutions for attitude changes is much more effective for me than making a resolution to [for example] put away my laundry right after it's done.  [although i'm seriously considering making that one.]  don't think these came easily though.  remember my 77 hours alone in my apartment?  definitely a turning point in the winter, but also definitely a rather low moment.

let's not have that again this year, 'kay?

from there, everything began to pick up with all sorts of great changes and steps forward.   all of this took effort - being active in decisions and movements.   it took confidence in myself, my skills, my qualities, and my friendships.  and oh, have there been adventures!  i'm making the most of my life here, every day, through Revels, through 18th Street Singers, through STUDIOS, through my friends, through my family, and most of all, through me. 

i'm thrilled to say that, for the second year running, i can look back at the last year and honestly say "i really love who i've become."  i never thought it would feel so good to say that, but it does.

does it pain me to know that all these wonderful feelings and events have happened because i chose to leave Jersey, and subsequently my family?  not in the slightest.  i actually think leaving was the best decision i've ever made.  and as the years are starting to pass here in DC, i'm more and more secure in the choice.  and now that my brother lives here, too?  i see my family more often than i ever thought i would, and i love that we get so much 'fun time' together.

i love living here.  i love working in this city.  i don't love being squished on the metro at 8am, but i love that i can get anywhere i want, either by car, train, bus or plane.  i love the small brick houses [and the townhouses, too] in virginia, and hope to own one [or the other] someday.  i love the huge Revels community, and how it's found me so many amazing friends, friends to last a lifetime and more.  i love that every time i turn around, there's another outlet for my creativity.  and i love that i've finally found a job that i could see myself at for a long time, learning new things every day, and it allows me to afford [in both time - well, mostly - and money] to have the life i want to lead.

so.

my resolutions for 2008?

• to continue being active and confident
• to trust my gut more, and not second guess myself (because i do make good decisions, dammit!)
  
• to always remember to live in the moment (and not dwell on the past)
  
• (and on that note) to "just be."

• oh.  and to put my laundry away, among other 'timely manner' things.

last year's word was hopeful.

i think the word of the year for 2008 should be boundless.

so many moments to love, laugh, cry, feel, soar, sing, and live.

the possibilities are endless.

What are your resolutions for 2007?

• to be more confident.
• to take an active role in my life.
• to continue having new adventures.
• to make the most of this new life i've created here in washington, dc.
  

i've been doing pretty well so far in 2006 with these little goals, and for those of you who know me, you know that it's not always the easiest thing for me to do.  i get really down and out about myself, and feel like i'm not good enough all the time.  well, it used to be all the time.  not so much anymore, but i still let it get to me sometimes.

so, i guess this isn't a new resolution but a re-affirmation of the feelings that hit me on the side of Masada in israel last year.  you would think it to be kinda cliche . . .  standing on the side of this 2000+ year old mountain fortress looking out over israel and jordan and have a life-altering moment of realization.

but happen it did.

it took a little while for me to figure out what i was supposed to do, but i knew after that moment that the life i was returning to in just a week would never be the same.  talking with everyone on the trip, i realized that i wasn't happy in my work or my love life or my life in general.  it wasn't bad, but it wasn't the kind of person i wanted to be.  i knew there was more to me than just commuting and work.

a year later, my life looks nothing like it did.  i've moved 300 miles from home to a new city, taken a new job, made new friends, learned new things i've never done before, returned to the stage, and [finally] written a new song.  i've dated three different guys, all not the guy for me.  and i've found myself enamored with a friend and i'm *still* trying to figure out if he feels the same way or has figured out how i feel or what.

2006 was really the year my life started.  i stopped being miserable from the aftermath of Dan, and i started really living life for ME.  people always say, "you have to learn to love yourself before you can love anyone else."  and they're totally right.  i really like the person i've become here.  i feel the most like myself than i have in a long time.  i have inspirations and desires and driving forces i never knew i had.  and i've got a fantastic group of friends that i can hardly imagine being here in DC without.

the word of the year for 2007?

hopeful.

for work, for friends, for fun, for love, for life. 

so hopeful.